RealEyes

The truth is I'm a "loner" because I put myself through stuff I don't want to go through again.  The truth is I'm super insecure and I found someone who loves me for who I am and I've found comfort in him.  The truth is I'm super insecure because I used to put my self worth and value in people and things that didn't care about me and my wellbeing.  The truth is You wouldn't believe me if I told you things about me that I've done or who I "used to be". The truth is God is real and he proves that to me repeatedly and I know I'm doing nothing to prove His realness and I have extreme conviction of this. The truth is This blog is the only thing thats made me feel like I'm potentially doing anything for anybody or somebody.  The truth is I'm not what I seem. And I'm sorry for that. Because all I've done for the last 29 years of my life is struggle, just like you. But all I've done is put on a front like I haven't

The truth is... it's not  easy being a christian. The last four year's since being back home (how has it been four years already?) It hasn't been smooth sailing and easy. I've done my best to be encouraging on here but I also don't want to forget that I promised to be real and raw. And the truth is... it's been hard. Life is hard. Being a christian is hard. Satan has seen me seek the Lord and he does not like it. His presence is so evident in the world right now. I'm not the only one fighting with the devil. And praise God if you are fighting the devil because that mean's you are not on his side!  In all honesty, this road I'm on that's one of seeking God and living for Him, has been one bumpy road. I brought home with me a lot of baggage. I've cleaned a few suitcases out but there seems to always be another one to unpack and clean out. It wasn't like a switch just flipped and I was all better just by coming back home away from all the me